Final Thoughts on Radical Romance

Throughout this semester I truly feel I have been enlighted to what is really liberating for men and women. When looking at the portrayl of a man or woman in mass media I never really looked in depth to what society's message of the relationships of males and females. Shows like "Sex and the City," movies such as "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" and books like "Breakfast at Tiffany's" were personally watched simply for entertainment value. But, I learned that these sort of movies, shows and books are channels for society to establish roles and standards for men and women. Mass media has an hidden agenda to keep society in it's norms which function to serve American capitalistic society. The main thing that opened up my eyes to a caplitalistic agenda, especially since I am a woman, is the portrayl of women in media. The idealized "slender body" as described in Cultural Studies by Chris Barker is pushed into the American audiences face through mass media. Women in today's American culture strive for the perfection society generalizes. Television shows, movies, books and otherwise seem to put out an idea of a radicial romance but I think that there really is no such thing in current day American culture. The ideals of a woman staying home, man going to work, male being dominate and female being subordinate are just enstilled in American minds by so-called radical romance depicted by mass media. The roles men and woman play in daily life help to serve the American capitalist machine and to keep men and women in place media performs reverse phychology by making fun of the norms men and women would like to break and then again enstilling these same norms in a subtle undertone. Radical Romance? Maybe to some, but not to me.

Hugh Hefner and his Twentieth Century Girls Next Door: Revised and Extended

Hugh Hefner, founder of Playboy and indeed quintessential playboy of his time, is infamous for having many girlfriends who are 40 to 50 years his junior, blonde, voluptuous and drop dead gorgeous. Hefner decided to air his not so conventional romantic relationships on television on August 7, 2005. He co-founded his first ever reality television show “The Girls Next Door” and let America into his everyday life dating three live-in girlfriends. America had always seen his entourage of women at his side through media but society has never had a chance to get to know them as they have always been nameless blonde bombshells. It is not typical that we as American’s accept a situation where one man is dating three women, particularly when the women are so much younger than the man. But, as Hefner has put his relationships into the media, society has found a new respect for these women and they are no longer nameless but, now they are seen as individuals: Holly Madison, Bridget Marquardt, and Kendra Wilkinson. These women in the spotlight of Hollywood are choosing to partake in a relationship that breaks American societal norms for monogamous “boyfriend and girlfriend” relationships. The idea that one 80-year-old man can have consistent intimate relationship with three women in their 20’s and 30’s is extremely radical in American culture. Although the reality television show “The Girls Next Door” on the surface, depicts twenty first century romantic relationships that can be seen as radical, the show actually reinforces societal norms placed on men and women through its mass media channel further enforcing gender expectations in American society.

In Simone de Beauvior’s feminist book The Second Sex, Beauvoir states “Thus humanity is male and man defines women in herself but as relative to him; she is not regarded as an autonomous being”(Beauvoir). Holly, Kendra and Bridget live in relation to Hefner. They are commonly referred to in society as “Hugh Hefner’s girlfriends.” These women are not their own entities: they live under Hefner’s rules, in his house and by his relationship standards. This goes back to the societal stereotypes assigned to the way an intimate relationship between a female and male should function. Women are expected to be seen, not heard and men are expected to be the financial supported of the female in their relationship. Hefner puts these women up in his home and allows them to have a fantasy lifestyle, but at what cost? The women of “The Girls Next Door” have to share their boyfriend with three if not many other women, they have a 9 p.m. curfew and they are seen as his objects of possession even though they have a voice and identity through way of their reality show.

Women who see this program are given the message that attaining the physical perfection depicted by these playmates on the show they too will be able to catch a man who will provide an extravagant lifestyle. This leads to generalized conceptions of a beautiful body and American obsession with plastic surgery. “The Girls Next Door” functions as a mass media channel to promote the American ideal of a perfect body for the female. American’s today are consumed with looking younger and more beautiful and have turned to plastic surgery and other beauty procedures as a product of the ideals of female beauty created and marketed by mass media. The Playboy industry itself defines beauty as tan, large breasted and practically physically flawless. For some women who pose for Playboy this ideal is attained by tanning beds and plastic surgery. Women who pose for Playboy are seen largely by the male population as extremely attractive and women will go to extreme lengths to look like women who pose in Playboy.

In Susan Bordo’s article “Material Girl”: The Effacements of Postmodern Culture she describes postmodern culture as one that has become plastic surgery obsessed and under the impression that bodies can be modeled in any way imaginable. Bordo states, “Popular culture does not apply any brakes to these fantasies of rearrangement and self-transformation. Rather, we are constantly told that we can ‘choose’ our own bodies” (Bordo). Women can choose to look like the women in Playboy by obtaining expensive and painful surgeries. Women can even take pictures of Holly’s breasts or Kendra’s buttocks into their plastic surgeon and simply say, “Give me that.” Through seeing these women on television live a life of luxury because of their looks sends the message to the women watching the show, “change your body and achieve success.” Bordo refers to women and goes on to say, “If we are never happy with ourselves, it is implied, that is due to our female nature, not to be taken too seriously or made into a ‘political question’”(Bordo). Society simply sees women’s issues with their bodies as human nature. The cause of body issues are not looked at as maybe being caused by mass media and the portrayal of feminine beauty in mass media. Capitalists will never let the blame lie with themselves for mass medias on the female body image and self-esteem as capitalists reap the benefits of having women unhappy with their bodies. The plastic surgery industry thrives from society’s low self-esteem and desire for perfection.

In Cultural Studies by Chris Barker, Barker states that in western societies the idea of the slender body for a woman is idealized, “Among the more powerful and influential representations of women within western culture is that of the ‘slender body’” (Barker 310). “The Girls Next Door” is a powerful and influential program in American society as these women post as role models and icons for what a woman’s body should look like. American society gets to know the women through the reality show and identifies with the women and in relation want to look like these women. The women of “The Girls Next Door” are slender and attain perfect bodies by American standards. Barker goes on to say, “Slenderness and a concern with diet and self-monitoring are preoccupations of western media culture with its interest in a ‘tighter, smoother, more constrained body profile.’” (Barker 310). Through media western society generalizes a body which all women should strive to attain. Although most women cannot have this “perfect body” described by American culture as they are genetically predisposed to another body type, many American women will go to great lengths to achieve a socially perfect body by resorting to plastic surgery and other beauty procedures. Men as well as women have to live up to societal standards created from genders. Even though men may not have to be physically perfect by western standards it is assumed that they are financially stable.

Hugh Hefner himself is put under the pressure of society to provide financially for these women and his children. He is the bread winner and is expected to take care of all of the women in his life. His ex-wife and children live in the home next door to the Playboy mansion in Beverly Hills where he fully supports two households. Hefner demonstrates the “typical” male characteristics as describe in the book Cultural Studies by Chris Barker, “In general terms, traditional masculinity has encompassed the values of strength, power, stoicism, action, control, independence, self-sufficiency, male camaraderie/mateship and work amongst others. Devalued were relationships, verbal ability, domestic life, tenderness, communication, women and children” (Barker 302). Hefner is all of the above and as such is seen in society by men as an “alpha male.” Hefner is surrounded by sex and money, two things that males use to define their success in today’s society. In the reality television show Hefner is seen by American society as devaluing relationships and women through his lifestyle and relationship choices. However, even though his relationship choice is looked down upon by American society many people still tune in every week and condone his actions. Americans for whatever reason do not look down upon Hugh Hefner and his lifestyle.

One of Hefner’s girlfriend’s unhappiness with the relationship is seen through her obvious desire for children. Time and time again Hefner’s girlfriend Holly is seen on the show mentioning children and marriage and Hefner, most of the time, ignores her comments. Even in an interview with Star Magazine Hefner’s girlfriend Bridget, when asked if Hefner will be changing diapers, states “Yeah, that'll never happen, unless they make him do it. He already said, ‘I'm not going to be raising the kid, it'll be your thing’” (Marquadrt). Hefner here is enforcing the societal norm that women are supposed to care and raise the children while the man has no obligation to the child, expect financially. Barker states that, “Men are commonly held to be more “naturally’ domineering, hierarchically oriented and power-hungry, while women are seen as nurturing, child rearing and domestically inclined” (Barker 285). Hefner and Holly perfectly fit this scenario of female and male in their relation to each other. Hefner is held above his women as he is the successful business man who built his company from the ground up. His girlfriend Holly is the stay at home woman who yearns for children and a “normal” lifestyle. Madison’s unhappiness reaches its peak when this year she announced that after a seven year relationship with Hefner they would be splitting up in an interview with Alison Waite of the American entertainment news show “Extra,” Holly candidly admits, “I want to be with somebody I can have more of a future with eventually. Hef and I can't get married and have kids...so it was fun while it lasted but it wasn't right for my old age. I got too old for Hef”(Madison). Although the extravagant lifestyle Holly lead was as she stated “fun” she wanted normalcy in her life that consisted of children which is the one thing Hefner could not provide her.

Hefner’s “power-hungry” tendencies can be seen through girlfriend Bridget’s interview. When Bridget is confronted about Hefner’s ego and his reaction to the girls’ newfound attention in the media Bridget replies, “He's amazed. But say we're on the red carpet — when they want to do individual pictures, he totally doesn't get it” (Marquadrt). Even though Hefner has put his girlfriends into Hollywood spotlight he still does not understand why the media wants to take pictures of them without him, again reinforcing the idea that women are not seen as their own entity but as an extension of the man. Hefner is use to being the center of attention and essentially the man who runs the relationship. His yearning for power is seen extensively through his possessive tendencies with his girlfriends.

The reality television show “The Girls Next Door” has brought light to

Hugh Hefner’s radical romance of the twentieth century. Without the television show society would not be able to seen the struggles some of the women have participating in this type of relationship. These women would remain nameless and would have continued to seem as though they are only objects of Hugh Hefner’s desire and not real humans. Although they are now real humans, Americans need to come to terms with the negative effects of mass media’s stereotypes for males and females. There are dangers in the norms set up for men and women in not only American society but western society as a whole. Women will continue to strive for the western idea of the perfect body through surgeries and beauty procedures that could be potentially fatal and men in western societies will be so power and money-hungry they will be consumed with stress. These kind of stereotypes and normalcy’s only breed a generation of unhappiness as society will never been satisfied.




Works Cited

Barker, Chris, and Paul Willis. Cultural Studies : Theory and Practice.Minneapolis: SAGE Publications, Limited, 2008.

De Beauvior, Simone. "Introduction: Woman as Other." The Second Sex. New York: Vintage.

Marquadrt, Bridget. "Star Exclusive: The Girls Next Door's Bridget Tells All!" Interview with Julia Allison. Star Magazine 17 Sept. 2007.

Bordo, Susan. "Material Girl: The Effacements of Postmodern Culture." Michigan Quarterly Review (1990).

Madison, Holly. "Holly Madison Talks Hefner Break Up, Calls Hef "High Maintenance"" Interview with Alison Waite. The Huffington Post. 3 Nov. 2008. 10 Dec. 2008 .

The 40-Year-Old Virgin

I was part of a group presentation on the film The 40-Year-Old Virgin which analyzed the film in terms of a sex comedy, disciplining the body, the ritual of dating and the reversal of gender roles as related to our course theme of the radical romance. My contribution to the presentation of the film was the discussion of the reversal of tradition gender roles. This reversal of gender roles helped the audience to identify with Andy at moments in the film as well as made Andy a more vulnerable character. Generally, the women in the film are self-sufficient and are actually more socially successful than the men. I also helped to develop the discussion on The 40-Year-Old Virgin as a sex comedy where the film fit the criteria of having disguise and masquerade, a “hierarchy of knowledge” and reversions and inversions of the “natural order” as described by Tamar McDonald in her book Romantic Comedy: Boy Meets Girl Meets Genre. Overall this was a good experience and our group worked extremely well together as we have very good feedback and discussion from the rest of the class.

The Neo-Traditional Romantic Comedy

The neo-traditional romantic comedy is defined by Tamar McDonald
in her book Romantic Comedy: Boy Meets Girl Meets Genre as, “The neo-traditional romantic comedy reasserts the old, ‘boy meets, loses, regains girl’ structure emphasizing the couple will be heterosexual, will form a lasting relationship and that their story will end as soon as they do so.” An example of the neo-traditional romantic comedy is How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days staring Kate Hudson as Andie a writer for the “How to” column in a women’s magazine and Matthew McConaughey as Ben an advertising executive. Ben makes a bet with his friends that he can make any woman fall in love with him in 10 days as he is a self-proclaimed
ladies man and Andie is writing a column on “How to Loose a Guy in
10 Days.” The couple meet in a bar a soon target each other for
their personal experiments. The film evokes some of the essential
elements and characteristics of the neo-traditional romantic
comedy: the over determination of romantic signifiers used in the
title of the film, and the evoking of earlier traditional romantic
comedy characteristics and the fairy tale ending moment or
the “Love Santa” moment as described by McDonald. The title of the
movie alone evokes a romantic feel for the comedy. If a viewer only
looked at the title they would know that the film was going to be
light and funny as well as have romance involved. As McDonald
states, “the film titles themselves parade their romantic comedy
status.” The film also evokes the earlier traditional romantic comedy
characteristics of the masquerade and the boy meets, loses and
regains girl scenario. Both main characters are masquerading for the
other; both do not know the other’s real intentions in the
relationship. The irony and comedy comes from situations where
Andie is trying to act the opposite of how a good girlfriend should act
and the audience sees that if she really acted as herself the couple
would ultimately fall in love through their similarities in likes, dislikes
and personalities. Also Ben meets Andie, has her superficially, looses
her when she realizes his intentions and regains her at the end of the
film. The end of the film also shows the “Love Santa” scene where
Ben wins Andie back on a bridge in the city, in the rain and they
make up, kiss and the camera pans out and they are assumed to
live happily ever after. How to Loose a Guy in 10 days debuted in
2003 and followed the neo-traditional characteristics for a romantic
comedy.

Hugh Hefner and his Twentieth Century Girls Next Door

Hugh Hefner, founder of Playboy and indeed quintessential playboy of his time, is infamous for having many girlfriends who are 40 to 50 years his junior, blonde, voluptuous and drop dead gorgeous. Hefner decided to air his not so conventional romantic relationships on television on August 7, 2005. He co-founded his first ever reality television show “The Girls Next Door” and let America into his everyday life dating three live-in girlfriends. America had always seen his entourage of women at his side through media but society has never had a chance to get to know them as they have always been nameless blonde bombshells. It is not typical that we as American’s accept a situation where one man is dating three women, particularly when the women are so much younger than the man. But, as Hefner has put his relationships into the media, society has found a new respect for these women and they are no longer nameless but, now they are seen as real people: Holly Madison, Bridget Marquardt, and Kendra Wilkinson. These women in the spotlight of Hollywood are choosing to partake in a relationship that breaks the societal idea that relationships should be monogamous which is extremely radical. Although the reality television show “The Girls Next Door” on the surface, depicts twenty first century romantic relationships that can be seen as radical, the show actually reinforces the societal norms and expectations placed on men and women.


In Simone de Beauvior’s feminist book The Second Sex, Beauvior states “Thus humanity is male and man defines women in herself but as relative to him; she is not regarded as an autonomous being”(Beauvior). Holly, Kendra and Bridget live in relation to Hefner. They are commonly referred to in society as “Hugh Hefner’s girlfriends.” These women are not their own entities: they live under Hefner’s rules, in his house and by his relationship standards. This goes back to the stereotypes put on society of the male and female relationship. Women are supposed to be seen not heard and the men are supposed to take care of the women. Hefner puts these women up in his home and allows them to have a fantasy lifestyle, but at what cost? They have to share their “boyfriend” with three if not many other women, they have a 9 p.m. curfew and they are seen as his objects of possession even though they have a voice and identity through way of their reality show.


Hefner is also put under the pressure of society to provide financially for these women and his children. He is the bread winner and is expected to take care of all of the women in his life. His ex-wife and children live in the home next door to the Playboy mansion in Beverly Hills where he fully supports two households. Hefner demonstrates the “typical” male characteristics as describe in the book Cultural Studies by Chris Barker, “In general terms, traditional masculinity has encompassed the values of strength, power, stoicism, action, control, independence, self-sufficiency, male camaraderie/mateship and work amongst others” (Barker 302). Hefner is all of the above and as such is seen in society by men as an “alpha male.” Hefner is surrounded by sex and money, two things that males use to define their success in today’s society.


One of Hefner’s girlfriend’s unhappiness with the relationship is seen through her obvious desire for a child. Time and time again Hefner’s girlfriend Holly is seen on the show mentioning children and marriage and Hefner signs her off. Even in an interview with Star Magazine Hefner’s girlfriend Bridget, when asked if Hef will be changing diapers, states “Yeah, that'll never happen, unless they make him do it. He already said, ‘I'm not going to be raising the kid, it'll be your thing’” (Marquadrt). Hefner here is enforcing the societal norm that women are supposed to care and raise the children while the man has no obligation to the child, expect financially. Barker states that, “Men are commonly held to be more “naturally’ domineering, hierarchically oriented and power-hungry, while women are seen as nurturing, child rearing and domestically inclined” (Barker 285). Hefner and Holly perfectly fit this scenario of female and male in their relation to each other. Hefner is held above his women as he is the successful business man who built his company from the ground up. His girlfriend Holly is the stay at home woman who yearns for children and a “normal” lifestyle.

Hefner’s “power-hungry” tendencies can be seen through girlfriend Bridget’s interview. When Bridget is confronted about Hefner’s ego and his reaction to the girls’ newfound attention in the media Bridget replies, “He's amazed. But say we're on the red carpet — when they want to do individual pictures, he totally doesn't get it” (Marquadrt). Even though Hefner has put his girlfriends into Hollywood spotlight he still does not understand why the media wants to take pictures of them without him, again reinforcing the idea that women are not seen as their own entity but as an extension of the man. Hefner is use to being the center of attention and essentially the man who runs the relationship. His yearning for power is seen extensively through his possessive tendencies with his girlfriends.

The reality television show “The Girls Next Door” has brought light to Hugh Hefner’s radical romance of the twentieth century. Without the television show society would not be able to seen the struggles some of the women have participating in this type of relationship. These women would remain nameless and would have continued to seem as though they are only objects of Hugh Hefner’s desire and not real humans.




Works Cited

Barker, Chris, and Paul Willis. Cultural Studies : Theory and Practice. Minneapolis: SAGE Publications, Limited, 2008.

De Beauvior, Simone. "Introduction: Woman as Other." The Second Sex. New York: Vintage.

Marquadrt, Bridget. "Star Exclusive: The Girls Next Door's Bridget Tells All!" Interview with Julia Allison. Star Magazine 17 Sept. 2007.

American Psycho and Problematic Masculinity

This week for class I examined the book Cultural Studies by Chris Barker and specifically chapter nine and his section on "Men and Masculinity." The section in Barker’s chapter Sex, Subjectivity and Representation really caught my interest. This section highlighted the social pressures and stereotypes created by society that are put on men. Men seek to separate themselves from women through less emotional behavior and societal standards of “control over other people and control over themselves” (Barker, 302). Barker states that men typically inhabit characteristics such as: “strength, power, stoicism, action, control, independence, self-sufficiency, male camaraderie/mateship and work” (Barker, 302). These characteristics are seen amongst most men today and if a male strays away from these male characteristics defined by society he is given a negative label. I also found the section on Problematic masculinity and The roots of male addiction interesting as typically female problems caused by societal norms are highlights whereas here the problems men encounter because of the societal norms they have to live up to are discussed. These sections discuss how men deal with the pressure of being the bread winners in society some men turn to addiction or depression, “along with the self-perceived failure to meet cultural expectations of achievement. Lies at the root of depression and drug abuse amongst men” (Barker, 304). When reading I connected it to so many men I have seen in my life who have faced or face alcohol and drug addiction fit this interpretation. A man has so much pressure to solely provide for his family, and if he does not he is a failure. Men’s success in life is so much defined by their career the amount of money they make that there is bound to be men who crack under the pressure of society because let’s face it…men are human just like women.

We also watched the film American Psycho and connected the movie to Barker's findings. I have never watched the film American Psycho and was surprised by how much the main character mirrored the problems men can encounter outlined in Barker’s “Problematic masculinity” section. The main character Patrick Bateman was the epitome of what a man is constructed to be by society wealthy, powerful, handsome, and unemotional. The movie depicted however, the dark side of a wealthy man where he seems to be there but in the movie admits that he is only a shell and there is nothing inside, “he is not really there.” It is very scary to see how societal pressures can push someone, especially males to their extreme to be at the top and as Patrick states, “to fit in.” Although this is a very extreme example because I am sure not all successful men turn into mass murders under pressure, there is a huge problem with the reputation that society makes for men and expects them to live up to.

"10" as a Romantic Comedy

Our 5th week in class we examined the movie 10 as a romantic comedy. I read chapter two from one of our required text books, The Romantic Comedy: Boy Meets Girl Meets Genre by Tamar Jeffers Mcdonald and connected her definition and characteristics of the romantic comedy the the characteristics of the film 10. These are the significant characteristics that stood out to me showing 10 as a good example of a romantic comedy:

As defined by McDonald, "a romantic comedy is a film in which has a its central narrative motor a quest for love, which portrays this quest in a light-hearted way and almost always to a successful conclusion" (McDonald, 9). The movie "10" falls into this definition of a romantic comedy by a "light-hearted" portray of a man going through his mid-life crisis and pursuing a woman, who is not his significant other and is in fact much younger than his significant other. The film also follows some of the generic elements found in romantic comedies. "10" has visual characteristics such as an urban setting, what seemed to be the Hollywood Hills and an extremely high end, swanky bachelor pad. The film did however, go against the typical stock characters depicted by McDonald, "characters who will be a couple by the film's end both start out with an unsuitable partner" (McDonald, 11). In "10" the male lead starts out with the right woman and only realizes she is the right woman by almost being with the wrong woman. The film also follows the ideology of a romantic comedy in that, "at the heart of every romantic comedy is the implication of sex" (McDonald, 13). At the heart of the main characters struggle with his age is his need to partake in the "free-love" era he lives in and the want to bed a younger woman which he describes as a "vision." I found this movie to be a good example of a romantic comedy.